I just finished running 6 miles. (Can I get a whoop whoop up in here? I am kind of proud of myself.) It is really hot here, and when I came home, my husband told me that I smell really bad.

I prefer to say that I smell really healthy.

In which I declare mine epistles concerning recent contemplations

The other night, I dreamed that I was in a horrible car accident. I was in a coma for a long time, and when I finally came around, my family and my husband were all gathered around my bed. I was awake, but not really aware of the situation. I asked what had happened, and Cary explained very somberly that I had been in a serious car accident, and that the doctors had no choice but to amputate my legs. My dream-self tried to absorb what he was telling me, mulled it over for a while, and replied:

"YES! I never have to go running ever again!"

Abby and I have been logging lots of miles lately, and apparently my subconscious has had quite enough. You and me both, dream-self. The temperature is creeping up here in Tay-has and our usual runs now seem extra long and sweaty. I got new running shoes recently, but the soft-and bouncy-new-running shoes-will-make-me-fast-and-awesome-at-running-euphoria has long since faded.

Anywho, the toasty weather is definitely upon us. I am already developing an extremely sexy t-shirt and sock tan. Right now the weather is just peachy, but I am having a hard time enjoying it because in the back of my mind all I can think is that it's only February and it's 85 degrees. I am going to die this summer. Luckily, the good ol' AF is footing our utility bills and I'd like to thank all tax payers in advance for allowing me to keep my thermostat at 50 degrees this summer.

While I can still go outside without boiling my internal organs, I have decided to try out my green thumb and grow a little herb garden. I thought I would include a handy little tutorial for how to grow an herb garden, for anyone who is interested. Follow these steps precisely, and you will have home-grown fresh and delicious herbs in no time!
1. Get married (essential).
2. Go to the local Wal-Mart and ask pretty please for your husband to buy you the raised garden bed kit. If he raises an eyebrow and asks if you know how to set up a garden, assure him that you will do all the work and you know exactly what you're doing.
3. Act really dumb and confused while reading the instructions and bat your eyelashes very cutely. If necessary, slowly attempt to put it together while looking very pathetic.
4. Make snickerdoodles and lemonade while your husband tills, shovels, nails, and etc. Call out, "Doing great, honey!" frequently so that he knows you are a team player.
5. Admire your husband's beautiful handiwork and then finish the easiest and most gratifying part, planting the seeds.

A very similar process also works for hanging pictures, staining furniture, assembling complicated things, and much more. I should write a book.

All up in my grill

There is something that is all up in my grill.

 In fact, there is a cat all up in my grill.

I don't particularly care for cats. And this little guy is sort of cute, but he is a nasty critter and keeps hissing and growling and being very obnoxious. I spent about half an hour trying to coax him out of the grill with turkey and cooing noises, and then trying to scare him out by unleashing Abby and banging on the grill, but he is not budging.

I think my next move is going to be to squirt water at him and see if it scares him away. But he doesn't have a collar and I'm very scared that he will chase after me and scratch me and give me rabies or something. Cats are the devil. So maybe our grill will just have a new tenant.

... At least until we light it up again on Saturday.

Somebody call I-X-I-I !

First matter of business:
Name that movie.

Second matter of business:
For the love of pete, why is it so difficult for me to make my blog not ugly??? I don't understand. I can't get it to have a picture and words without the picture getting all wonky and humongous. And don't even get me started on widths and cropping and fonts and whatnot. All I really want is a nice looking blog title thinymajig. Is that too much to ask? Someone please come over and explain it to me and make my blog cute. I would settle for just "not ugly."

Thirdly:
I found a flea on Abby's head today, which ruined all of my plans for the day. Instead I spent the day obsessively vacuuming, scrubbing, washing the dog in the tub (which was kind of hilarious), scratching at the phantom bug bites I kept feeling, and generally being a psycho neurotic weirdo. Soon I will write a great blog post detailing the wonderful times of my fam bam being in town this weekend. 2 words: Blue. Bell. And a loooooot of it. 3 more words: AWESOME. NEW. GRILL. My parents gifted us with a beautiful new grill and it is about to get all kinds of delicious up in hurr. 4 words: I. LOVE. my. family.

Conversations in the night

Set the scene: 2 in the morning at the Reeves' house. Abby has decided it is a good time to let out a random bark, which causes both of us to wake up and stir.

Amy: What is Abby barking at?
Cary: (Eyes wide open, appearing completely lucid) I think our neighbors are trying set up their own Norad.
Amy: ... Huh?
Cary: You know... tons of satellites and everything... like Norad or something. Their whole house is covered in satellites.
Amy: ....?
Cary: (frustrated that I do not understand) You know what Norad is right??
Amy: What are you talking about?
Cary: NORAD! North American Aerospace Defense Command.
Amy: Yes... but... I don't... understand... what you are talking about right now.
Cary: Never mind, I'm going back to sleep.

2 minutes later:
Cary: Oh wait. I think I dreamed that whole thing.

And then I couldn't fall asleep because every time I would drift off I would remember that ridiculous conversation and it would make me laugh all over again.

This morning he only vaguely remembered having this conversation. I think sleep talking is my number one favorite form of entertainment in the universe.

Things Abby and I have in common

1. We are both blonde.
2. We are both a bit on the round-ish side.
3. I still think we're both kind of cute.
4. Neither of us can be trusted with a lot of food around us. We are both lacking in the self-control department. We also both get really excited when it's meal time.
5. We both love bacon. And cheese. And waffles.
6. We both love Cary and get kind of bummed out every time he leaves.
7. We both love go to on walks and runs but usually get tired and want to sit down pretty quickly.
8. We both tend to scare off our friends by being a little to over eager and excited. Neither of us are very adept at socializing properly.
9. We both would be completely content to spend an entire day lounging and eating and napping in the sun. And I tell you what, there is nothing like watching your dog take a nap in the sun to zap your motivation to do homework entirely.
10. We both broadcast the many horrible injustices in our lives with much whining and groaning and barking (that one's just Abby), and sighing. Neither of us likes to suffer in silence.

And we are both so so so excited that my family is coming on FRIDAY! Woohoo! Can't wait to show them around scenic Del Rio!

I'm really much funnier in my head

I couldn't fall asleep last night, and as my thoughts bounced around in that half-asleep state, I thought of what I was positive would be the World's Most Hilarious Blog Post. I was giggling to myself and patting myself on the back for how hilarious I am. I thought about jotting down my thoughts quick, but I knew that it was just too darn hilarious for me to forget.

It's now 7:17 in the morning and I have absolutely no idea what I thought would be so funny to blog about. I think maybe it had to do with Valentine's day? But I haven't the foggiest.

But it's probably for the best. My half-asleep judgment can't really be trusted, after all. I tend to think several things are much funnier than they really are when I am experiencing them in such a state, such as: Movies like Nacho Libre and Hot Rod-

-I just remembered part of what I was going to blog about. It still makes me laugh. But chances are it will not be amusing to 96% of the population. I am going to tell you anyway. I still have no idea why I thought this would be such a great thing to post about.

Last night, we were trying to go to bed early because the Care Bear had to be up-and-at-em pretty early this morning. Ever since I have been cohabitating with a member of the male population, I have stopped wearing my retainer. There are few things on the earth that are less sexy than retainers. But I was thinking that the thousands of dollars of orthodontia that went into my mouth should not go to waste, and I should try to wear the thing occasionally. It may be shocking to find out that it did not fit very well after 8 months. But I wore it anyway. It was my turn to say the prayer, but the prayer ended in very irreverent fits of laughter after hearing my horrible retainer lisp. We spent probably an hour cracking up over the hilarity of saying things like "Physicist's assistant" other phrases with a lot of S's. It just so happens that I made Cary watch She's The Man with me the other night, and even though there was a lot of eye rolling involved, he laughed at several parts. For those who have seen the movie, we then moved on to quoting all of Eunice's lines, complete with lisp-y retainer voice, which sent us into complete and utter hysterics. For reference:

For those who haven't seen She's The Man, how are we friends?? Just kidding. Kind of. Anyway, we were absolutely dying,  and we eventually drifted off to sleep, still laughing about lisps and retainers. Being married to your best friend is absolutely the best thing ever. He makes me smile, from ear to ear. I love seeing that serious, Air Force, focused guy be completely silly and goofy.

Anyway, it remains a mystery why I thought this was so very pertinent and amusing to be shared on the blog.

And Happy Valentine's Day to you all! I love Valentine's Day, but the hubs is not the biggest fan. But Happy Valentine's Day anyway to the best adventure partner ever. I got him a new water bottle and a giant Kit Kat bar, which I ate half of. I mean, I ate it after I gave it to him. I didn't give him a half-eaten Kit Kat.
Anyway. Love you, Care Bear.

I love that man of mine.

I'm considering making the ol' blog private. That just means you'd have to send me your e-mail address so I could add you as a reader of my blog. I would say that I'm considering doing it in order to be safe and protect my identity and etc.

But mostly I just want to be able to tell stories about people I am not particularly fond of without worrying about them stumbling across my blog someday.

Decisions, decisions.

If I made my blog private, would it deter your readership? Thoughts?

Somebody call whine one one and get me a waaaaah-mbulance

Whenever I'm in one of those pity-party-I'm-fat-and-have-a-lot-of-zits-and-school-is-hard-and-I-am-dumb-and-everyone-is-cooler-than-me-and-I'm-weird-and-awkward-and-no-one-likes-me-wah-wah-wah-life-is-so-hard-for-Amy moods, I make myself sing that "Nobody likes me, everybody hates me, guess I'll go eat worms" song.

It always makes me laugh and realize that whatever I'm fretting about is not the end of the world and I need to put on my big girl panties and stop being a drama queen.

And that is my motivational speech of the day.

Also.

Why does blogger gotta be so confusing? Sorry my blog is ugly. I worked on it forever and it came to pass that it made my head hurt and I couldn't figure it out and it is ugly. Oh well.

Amy's Soup Kitchen

Much to my delight, it was been cold lately, and we've been eating lots of warm soups in this house. Soup is one of my favorite things to eat. A bowl of soup + warm bread or rolls= Heaven. Here are some of my favorites....

PW's Corn Chowder with Chiles
This soup is insanely delicious. We had it with chicken quesadillas and it was delightful. It might sound a little strange at first, but trust me, it's gold.

The Best Chili Ever
Our friend recently gifted us with a whole bunch of venison and I was much a-feared. I have never cooked with venison and the whole idea is just grodee to me. But I put the ground venison meat into this chili and hot dang, it was delicious. This chili is good stuff, peeps. It's on the spicy side, but you can be a wimp and seed the jalepeno if you are lacking the cojones. You can also make it with ground beef, or turkey or with no meat it all if you're into that kind of thing. Here are the Reeves' household we are most definitely not into that kind of thing. If I were to serve a dinner that didn't involve meat, my husband just might file for a divorce. The man likes his meat.

And now for a soup recipe that is mostly from my noggin. It was cold one night and I was really wanting some soup. I perused a few recipes and combined and tweaked a handful based on what I had in my kitchen to make what I like the call "The Best Soup That Has Ever Entered My Mouth."

I admonish you all to make this soup with great haste. I thought I'd be all food blogger-y and take pictures, but it was a real struggle for me. I got all stressed out about burning the roux and all that jazz so I only have pictures of the beginning of the process. And then we inhaled the soup like we were starving children in Africa, and I kept forgetting to take pictures of the final product. It's really not all that fancy looking. But please make it even though there is no picture. The hubs and I were both crazy about it. It has a fair amount of butter and cream, but it's really rich and filling. Your taste buds, family, and soul will thank you.

I did manage to take a picture of all the members that came to this soup party:

Ingredients:
1/2 c carrots
1/2 c celery
1/2 c onion
1/2 c mushroom
2 tbs butter
4 c chicken broth
2 c water
2 cooked  boneless chicken breasts, shredded (Awesome Tip: Cook your chicken, stick it in a mixing bowl and then go to town on it with your hand mixer. It works amazingly and it so much faster than slaving away with two forks. Seriously.)
1 14.5 oz package quick cooking Long Grain and Wild Rice with seasoning packet
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp pepper
A few shakes of garlic powder, onion powder, and paprika (Smoked paprika is the bomb)
3/4 c flour
6 tbs butter
1 c milk
1 c heavy whipping cream

1. Chop up all of your veggies into bite sized pieces. You can use whatever veggies float your boat.
2. Melt 2 tbs of butter into a big ol' pot. I used my dutch oven pot. Add the vegetables and cook for a few minutes, until onions are soft and translucent.
3. Add the chicken broth, water, and shredded chicken. Bring to a boil, stir in the rice (without the seasoning packet), cover, and remove from heat.
4. Combine the flour, salt, pepper, and spices into a small bowl.
5. In a medium saucepan, melt the 6 tbs of butter. Stir in the seasoning packet from the rice package and stir until bubbling. Reduce heat to low and stir in the flour mixture in 1 tbs at a time. This mixture will be REALLY thick. Almost like play-dough. I was freaking out that I had ruined our soup. Don't fret. All is well.
6. Whisk in the cream slowly and whisk until the mixture is smooth. Cook until thickened. (Won't take long at all. Maybe 2 minutes or so)
7. Stir this cream mixture into the broth and rice. Cook over medium heat for 10-15 minutes, or until rice is done.
8. Eat, drink (Diet Coke) and be merry.

This made 6 big ol' filling servings for us. So you don't have to feel guilty about the whole stick of butter and cup of cream in there.

 Hey in other news, we finally have a guest bed set up! Come visit! Please?
You can sleep here:

I really love my round Mickey Mouse pillow.

Precious.

Things to consider while you watch this video:

1. I am not pregnant or hormonal in any way.
2. I'm not really even an animal lover of some sort. (Unless that animal happens to be Kola or Abby)
3. But I still may or may not have cried a little bit.

And in case you feel like crying some more:

And now I need to go put on some new mascara.

Thoughts on the Super Bowl

Fergie looks like a drag queen. And she absolutely can not sing. Her little rendition of Sweet Child O' Mine made my ears hurt.

Loved this commercial:

There are 2 types of people in the world. Those who like avocados and those who are missing out on life. My husband is among those who deny themselves the bliss that is guacamole, and this is a major obstacle in our marriage. I made some guac for a little Super Bowl shin dig we went to tonight, and I have decided that I could live my entire life on nothing but chips and guac. And maybe a little ice cream. In other food news, my sweet mother sent me a package recently that contained a big bag of valentine's M&Ms. Cary and I demolished them in 48 hours. We also finally defeated Bowser, so it was a big weekend at the Reeves' house.

I am glad I'm married now and I don't have to pretend to like football anymore. When I was single, I wanted to maintain the image that I enjoyed watching sports because I wanted boys to think I was sporty and cool. But now that I already tricked one into marrying me, I can finally be at ease and spend the game eating snacks and criticizing Fergie's performance. I feel like a gigantic burden has been lifted.

Going into the game, Cary had very little idea of who was even playing. I had to convince him to come to the party, just to eat some food and see friends. Approximately 30 seconds into the game, he became a die-hard Steeler's fan. I was very amazed at how quickly this emotional loyalty formed. He really chose the wrong band wagon to jump on there. 

My Super Bowl 2011 experience can be summed up thusly:
- I love buffalo chicken dip
- I love guacamole
- I love peanut butter brownies
- I love talking obnoxiously through the entire game with girlfriends while the boys cry over interceptions and what not.

So basically it was just a regular day-in-the-life of Amy, where the highlights for me involved what I ate.

I am already excited about eating my leftover guac tomorrow for lunch.

Saturday Morning Blogging

I can no longer sleep past 7:30 a.m. This saddens me. At the ripe old age of 21, my body is already betraying me. I can't sleep in, my hips are widening at an alarming rate, and I got heartburn the other day after eating Chipotle (but that was totally worth it).

We had this heart healthy lunch thing at work the other day. Most of the things I make involve way too much butter, sugar, and/or bacon to be considered heart healthy, so I decided to make those black bean brownies that have been circulating the internet. You puree a can of black beans and some water and add it to brownies instead of oil and eggs. The verdict: Meh. I coudn't tell there were black beans in there, and the brownie was really dense and chocolaty, though slightly "off" tasting. But in my opinion, if you are going to have a brownie, have a good brownie and don't go putting vegetables into your dessert. Plus, pureed black beans have now made it onto the list of Top Ten Things That Gross Me Out. I think I will share that list now. Which I am also making up right now:

1. Cold soup. Disgusting. All of the fat blobs and sometimes it is just one gelatinous mass. I make Cary heat up our leftover soup.
2. Soggy bread. It makes me dry heave. I am getting nauseous just thinking about it.
3. Picking up Abby's dumb poop when she decides to drop a load while we're jogging. I about tossed my cookies the other day. That stuff is pungent.
4. Raw chicken. Or basically any raw meat. Every time I am handling raw meat, I have to bleach my entire kitchen afterward. Blech.
5. Tuna. Why do people eat that stuff?? It is completely foul. Plus, most people combine their tuna with my other nemesis, mayonnaise. It boggles my mind. And makes me feel queasy.
6. Ear wax. I clean my ears like a maniac. When I see ear wax in someone's ear, I am overcome with a desire to grab a q-tip and go to town. But I'm fairly certain that people would not appreciate the gesture.
7. Belly button lint. I think Cary could make a sweater out of all of the belly button lint that collects in there. A belly button lint sweater is about the most disgusting thing I can even fathom. I'm glad I don't have a hairy belly button. Because that would also be gross.
8. Mayonnaise. I am starting to slightly get over this hatred, but may I be struck by lightning if I ever put mayonnaise on my sandwich. I can eat a few things that have mayonnaise in them, like chicken salad, as long as I don't think about it too much.
9. Roaches. I went to get a mixing bowl out from my cabinet the other day to find that a roach had decided to make it his home. I am not afraid of killing bugs, but killing roaches is the worst because they make that nasty popping sound. And they are fast little boogers! But I can not stop until I know that sucker is dead.
10. Pureed black beans. It looks like chunky chocolate milk and smells like foot.

I had a really long and whiny blog post written about not fitting in and grown up life being lame, but I decided it was too negative so I deleted it.
...And instead I wrote about things that are disgusting? Sorry folks.

Back to our regular scheduled programming as soon as I think of something funny and/or delicious to write about.

Baby I like it.

The amount of school work I have to do is directly proportional to how much time I spend blogging and browsing around the interwebs. Today I wasted a large chunk of time watching random music videos:

I don't know why, but I love this song and I listened to it like 4 times a row when I was running the other day. But it actually doesn't make any sense, because I'm not actually sure Enrique Iglesias even likes women. Silly, confused Enrique. I'm not really sure why, and I am kind of embarrassed about it, but I sort of have a crush on him.

Here are some of my other favorite ways to waste time:

failblog.org Sometimes a little risque, but always hilarious:

awkwardfamilyphotos.com I think it has declined in hilarity as of late, but there are definitely some gems to be found:

cakewrecks.blogspot.com Good for some laughs.

 Happy Procrastinating!