Thursday, January 31, 2013

Things on a Thursday

Ahoy there, mateys! Time for my bi-monthly blog post-o-rama. Perhaps someday I will get into the habit of blogging more than that, but today is not that day.

Let's start with a quick recap of recent google searches that have caused people to stumble upon this blog. This never fails to amuse me/concern me.

1. "Sexy women posing aircraft engines"
I am positive that these are the kinds of photos they were searching for. That flight suit does wonders for my womanly curves. Eat your heart out.

2. "Pregnancy wedding belly"
Perhaps they are referring to this photo, and if so I am offended.
It's not my fault that my brothers are weaklings.

3. "How to draw a cartoon roach."
Well, I am the expert on this.

4. And once again, 278 people have found themselves on this blog after searching for "vienna sausages." The world is a strange, strange place.

I don't know when this blog turned into a dump of pictures from my phone accompanied by ramblings, but I'm just rolling with it.
The Care Bear and I found ourselves perusing the annals of Netflix one evening, as we are wont to do, and found this delightful program of fireplaces burning. There are 4 entire episodes, one of which includes Christmas carols playing festively in the background! At this point we are not so desperate for Friday night jollies that we actually watched the entire series of FirePlace, but the discovery alone provided several minutes of hilarity.
 Do any of you watch Breaking Bad? If you don't, don't start. It will damage your delicate psyche and corrupt your naive little suburbian soul. And in the words of Fat Amy (not me, Fat Amy from Pitch Perfect, come on!), "Sometimes I have the feeling I could do crystal meth... But I think, mmm... better not." But this poster is still fantastic. Also, I want a puppy. This week I discussed with Cary the disturbing reality that my heartstrings are yanked upon much more profoundly by adorable puppies than by human babies. I should probably correct this tendency before we produce offspring, as they are almost guaranteed to be in the human baby form.
 My widdle bothers came to visit me! And so did my mama! It was absolutely delightful. We spent the weekend bowling, playing games, exploring Spokane and stuffing ourselves silly with delicious food that I cooked. My entire family is still in complete shock that I now know how to cook something besides a bowl of cereal. Miracles really do happen.
 This is my attempt at teaching my mom to be hip and make a duck face for pictures. So close, Mama bear. My mom is my bestest friend. I think she should move here. I really don't think either of our husbands would mind.
Luckily Josh came to my mom's rescue with a tremendous duck face of his own. Look at that lip extension. Throw in a peace sign and he is there.
 Ohp, there's that peace sign. We are ready for a day at the duck pond with our fellow teenage girls.
 I know what you're thinking and yes, it can be stressful at times to be in a family full of such ridiculously good looking people. It is just our cross to bear.
 We went to the batting cages! I laughed at Ryan and Josh for only hitting about 3/4 of the balls and then I got in there and only managed to hit about 3 of my 25 pitches. It was real embarrassing. I have bad depth perception!

I wish I took more pictures of our fantastic weekend together. I had so much fun getting my domesticity on and cooking and cleaning for my company. When the Care Bear is out of town, I revert entirely back to the ol' single days. I eat Lean Cuisines for dinner, never make the bed, and generally just become a malnourished and messy blob. Even though school occasionally fills me with murderous rage, I appreciate the fact that it forces me to get dressed and leave the house each day. Because without it, I think I would become chemically bonded to our couch. And no one wants to see that.

Hey speaking of hair, everyone told me that I would do weird things to my hair whilst in beauty school and I was all pffff no I will not. And while I still will not be adding unnatural colors or doing bizarre haircuts, I have been considering going dark. I've had blonde hair forever, and I've always wondered what I would look like with dark hair. I've gone light-brown a couple of times but I never really liked it. So I'm thinking about going all out and really going dark this time. Take a gander at this extremely realistic photo of myself with brown hair that I made just now via the world wide web.
You're a little impressed with my computer skillz right now, don't lie. But seriously people, should I dye my hair brown?? You know I can't make any decisions without consulting with my loyal blog readers. And while we're at it, what should I eat for lunch tomorrow? Weigh in at your earliest convenience.
Another hairstyle I'm considering. Tres natural, no?

Saturday, January 12, 2013

...And 2013 is off with a bang. I mean "fringe."

If the title of this blog post confuses you, just keep reading.

Salutations, oh people of the world wide web! (Side note: I just now, as in right this moment, realized that the www of comes from world wide web. Is this common knowledge?? I am dumb.) Anywho. I present unto you a missive containing my deepest thoughts regarding the following:

1. My husband's birfday celebrations.
2. Why skiing is the wold's most glorious sport.
3. My decision to attend cosmetology school.

Buckle in, y'all, it's gonna be a long one.

Cary turned 26! That old fart. Cary is not really a big birthday guy, but I LOVE birthdays. Thus all of the cheesy excited faces in the following photos:
 A day-trip hiking bag! Cary was so surprised! Okay so maybe Cary picked out half of his presents while we were at REI a few weekends ago... I don't have the hiking and camping knowledge required to pick out presents for him. I'm what they call "indoorsy."
 Gift cards from the Reeves! Yahoo!
 And then we put Abby in a box and it was quite amusing. She just stood in there looking depressed until Cary picked her up and took her out.
 Cary also got this headlamp for his birthday, and I really did pick it out by myself! I was so proud of myself. Cary was much more excited than I would anticipate one would be when receiving a light that you strap to your head.

 For Cary's birthday lunch, we went to a really delicious pizza place in our neighborhood. So scrumptious. And our pizza had no green things on it, because it was Cary's birthday.
 Whoops, now we're back at gift opening time. Get it together, blog! Let's all take a moment to laugh at the fact that Cary is wearing a bath robe, and wears it quite frequently. With his slippers. Is this is 26th or 96th birthday? And look at all those gift cards! Thanks, Reichmans! Gift cards are the best, because with just regular money, you might feel obligated to do something responsible and grown-uply with it. But with gift cards, you have to just enjoy them. Three cheers for that.

2.  The day after Cary's birthday, we went on a little mini-ski trip! It was fantastic. I stink at all sports in the world, except skiing. And after 3 seasons, Cary is starting to get pretty good too! Who wants to hear a joke? What is the difference between a vacuum and a snowboard? The way you attach the dirtbag. Ba-dum chh! I kid, I kid. Kind of. Here's my theory on the snowboard/ski debate: When given a choice of winter sports, the idiot population as a whole is most likely going to choose snowboarding. This does not mean that all snowboarders are idiots; it just means that there is a higher proportion of idiots amongst the snowboarding community. I'm just sayin.

 It was freezing. You know those bags of frozen chicken that are labeled as "ice-glazed chicken breasts?" That is how I felt.
Hooray for skiing!
Warming up in the lodge between runs. Cary looks like a sleepy bear.
Day 2 at Schweitzer. On top of a verrrrry steep black diamond. Cary was a trooper and rocked that bad boy!
 I just really like skiing a whole lot.

3. I started hair school this week. 1 week down, 51 to go. Good grief. So far it's been... alright. I enjoy the actual learning and hands on practice, but it is so far mostly an exercise in learning to control my eye-rolling reflexes. Paul Mitchel THE School (don't even think about just calling it Paul Mitchell) has some, ahem, interesting beliefs and requirements. For example, we are not allowed to use the word bangs, they are called "fringe". We don't make mistakes, we make "learning discoveries". You don't wash someone's hair, you have a "wash house experience." And they are so serious about all this nonsense. Everyone takes themselves so dang seriously! It's hair school, people! Not exactly medical school here. Being a 23 year old married woman who doesn't drink, smoke, have tattoos, or have multiple body piercings really puts me in the minority in the hair school student demographic (as does knowing the word demographic... ha. That was mean). But aside from all of my grumblings, I'm learning a lot, everyone has been fairly pleasant so far, and I'm sure it'll be just dandy. Hey look at my up-dos (oh wait, I mean "up-styles") that I've made and tell me I'm totally radical.
 This is pretty significant, seeing as I did not know how to french braid prior to this week.

I really struggled with the decision to go to hair school. As you are probably aware, I've spent the last year frantically trying to decide on a path for my life. Getting pregnant seemed like the answer to so many prayers, and losing that pregnancy really rocked my world. I felt completely turned upside down. During that brief pregnancy, I missed the deadline for a few programs I was considering applying to. After some pretty tough weeks of feeling purposeless and with Cary's trips and deployments looming, I knew I just really needed to do something to get out of the house and feel productive. So, here we are. And of course, 2 days after I started hair school, I got an e-mail about my dream job that I applied for several months ago, asking me to interview. Argh. I am feeling a little more than anxious to get down the road several years and see the wisdom in His timing. I know that God has a plan for me, but I won't lie, it's a little difficult to see right now. Hopefully I'm finally on the right track with this hair school thing, but you might want to buy up some stock in Haagen Dazs just in case.

Oh and hey! Guess what else?? My super awesome friend Nichole runs a sweet couponing blog at and she had a giveaway for this great Coach bag, and I won! It came in the mail a few days ago, and it was like extended Christmas! Hot dog!