Sunday, March 6, 2011

Evening News

Attention blog-o-sphere.

I have had the hiccups approximately 15 times today. They last about 20 minutes per session, and they are an awkward hiccup/painful burp combo. My rib cage is sore from an exhausting day of hiccuping. It happens during very inopportune moments, such as during church and while answering the phone. Here is a list of things I have tried to stop the relentless hiccuping.

1. Drinking water
2. Holding my breath
3. Eating cadbury mini eggs
4. Making Cary scare me
5. Eating cake
6. Complaining
7. Collecting all of the star coins on Mario on the wii. (Only 3 left-booya.)
8. Complaining some more

Nothing has worked! But it's obvious that I just need to eat more Cadbury mini egss. I told myself I wasn't going to buy any until Easter. But after a rough trip at Wal-Mart, I was jonesing for hit and there they were, sitting all pretty-like near the register. So I fell off the wagon. Failure has never tasted so good.

Back to the issue at hand. When I was little, I used to love having hiccups. I am not really sure why. Probably the same reason that I thought it was cool to get a bloody nose and I really wanted crutches. I was a strange child. But hiccups have lost their appeal and I no longer get excited about them. How do you get rid of hiccups?? But for reals, ya'll! Help a sister out. Because I think I am getting a chronic case of hiccups. How embarrassing.


  1. Drink out of the wrong side of the cup. Sounds crazy, but you have to lean over and drink out of the glass from the side furthest away from you. I swear it works!

  2. i canNOT believe that 3 and 5 didn't work. how rude these tasty treats have been to you. and i always wanted crutches. but man those suckers hurt your armpits! i always wanted a cast too... until i had one.

    what about maybe a carbonated bev? maybe you'll kinda choke on the bubbles and it will make the hiccups go away. that sounds really horrible, but i always kinda choke on the carbonation with the first few drinks from a can.

    good luck!!

  3. You should try getting Cary to play Mario on the WII with you. The competitiveness that will consume you should block out all else and the hiccups will disappear. However, there is no guarantee that they will stay away once you stop playing....

  4. I tried to comment on this yesterday and it wouldn't let me. I think you should eat as much bread as possible in one minute and then wash it down with one large glass of ice cold water. I hope you don't still have hiccups!

  5. You know, I've heard that a good treatment for hiccups is keeping a vat of jello next to your bed, waking up at 3 am, sticking your face in the jello and yelling "Boy I'm tired!" before going back to sleep. Don't knock it till you've tried it. Also, I'd try cadbury mini eggs again, because I've eaten almost an entire bag in the past 12 hours (And 6 or 7 of those hours were sleep) and boy are they delicious.